It’s true that opposites attract.

Financial opposites can also attract, so what is a couple to do?  If you’ve ever had sparks flying when it comes to finances while dating, don’t expect the fire to put out quickly once the marriage begins. If you’re not careful, someone could get burned!

Serious problems in a marriage can many times, according to psychologists, exist because of the financial health of the household

But it’s possible to get ahead of those problems, and the financial challenges that come with them, if you simply find some common ground before the wedding day arrives. You might be more focused on finding a reception site and picking the perfect flowers, but be sure you’re also having these discussions:

Get in touch with your financial personality

You may have tons in common, but that doesn’t mean you operate the same way where money’s concerned. It’s very important you talk about how you both spend, save and invest, so that you can make decisions you’re both comfortable with.

Plan ahead, farther than you think you need to

Even if you’re a young couple, now’s the time to discuss your future goals. Planning for your financial future requires taking steps now, such as deciding how much you’ll set aside from each paycheck. So don’t put off talking about retirement goals, even though it may seem far away.

Talk about the tough subjects

Blending a family requires a lot of work, and the financial side is no different. Before the wedding, you need to have a conversation about money. You don’t want to make the “what’s mine is yours” assumption and you don’t want to get five years in, then have to determine which kids get what. Now is the time to settle it all: insurance, wills and trusts.

Plan for your spouse’s security

One of the most beautiful gifts you can give your new spouse is the knowledge that he/she will always be taken care of. Couples need to establish peace of mind that if something happens to one of you, the other spouse won’t suddenly be forced to part with major assets, such as college funds or your house. Different kinds of insurance, such as life or disability insurance, are more appropriate depending on your age and situation, so consult an insurance expert about your options.

  • Start young. Find a way to follow a few general financial rules, and you’re going to be much more relaxed about your financial future, which always spells a happier marriage. First, if your company offers a match on your retirement plan, get it.  Next, fund a ROTH IRA for tax free growth forever.  Tax rates are likely to be higher when you retire, so putting money in now is a good bet to have more money for retirement. But also, know that it’s never too late to get started. There’s nothing more stressful than starting from scratch at 40 or 50, feeling like you missed the boat, and doing nothing as a result. You’re responsible for your future, and now both of you are responsible for each other, too.
  • Make a will and keep it up to date. Problems with wills are common, and they can cause huge heartache and headaches. Before you tie the knot, see an attorney and do a basic will. If you are going to have a blended family, now is the time to talk with a financial advisor and attorney to discuss possible issues. You’ll see some tax benefits from this planning and also know that your wishes are carried out.
  • Decide who does what. There’s simply no right way to decide who will be in charge of the finances, and that’s why you have to talk about it. Whatever you decide, it has to be an arrangement that works for both of you, so be ready to listen and compromise. If one person often handles the finances, that person should work with an advisor they trust who will help their spouse if something happens to them.
  • Talk it through with an expert. There truly are a lot of financial issues for new couples to consider, and they differ depending on your age and each spouse’s family situation. So one of the best things you can do is find a financial advisor  to walk you through these discussions. Financial advisors often specialize in different areas, so make a few phone calls to find an  advisor who will do a consultation that addresses your stage in life and walk you through the next steps.

You’d think that establishing a solid financial base as a couple has more to do with the number on your bank statement than anything else, but really, like most things in marriage, it’s about good communication.

Talk now””and keep talking””and your financial situation will be happily ever after.

About Beau Henderson

Beau Henderson is a financial advisor, author, coach, radio personality, and CEO of RichLife Advisors. He has helped over 3,000 clients to not just improve their relationship with money, but to live the life of their dreams.


  1. denny hagel on October 18, 2010 at 9:04 pm

    Great advice! As with anything, communicating is the key! Thanks for sharing as I know this will help a lot of people avoid potential problems.

  2. Lily Iatridis on October 19, 2010 at 12:44 am

    What an informative article! I need to print this out and save it for my older boys. I think my husband and I are on track with everything you mentioned, with the exception of the will!!

  3. Beau Henderson on October 19, 2010 at 3:38 am

    You are right Denny. Investing in good communication would prevent so many problems in all areas of life…

  4. Beau Henderson on October 19, 2010 at 3:52 am

    Thanks Lily! I appreciate your willingness to share with the boys. I wrote this post based on problems I’ve worked through with couples over the years. Most of the time true beliefs about money come out when there is a major stressor or a negative situation.

  5. Katie Hong on October 19, 2010 at 4:01 am

    Great advice. It’s easier to not talk about money, even with your spouse, but it’s so important to talk & keep talking.

  6. Beau Henderson on October 19, 2010 at 4:11 am

    So true Katie. It’s often the hard conversations that can give us the most peace of mind.

  7. Rachelle on October 19, 2010 at 4:49 am

    They say that money is the # 1 problem for married couples. Absolutely great advise!

  8. Victoria Gazeley on October 19, 2010 at 6:54 am

    Great advice, Beau. All excellent things to keep in mind – and things many never talk about.

  9. Susan McKenzie on October 19, 2010 at 5:45 pm

    Great advice, Beau… I’ve been procrastinating on a few of your points, such as creating and updating a will! Thank you for a timely reminder and good advice!

Leave a Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.